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So as I see it....only one option; immediately and without thought of consequence, trade in your X5 50i for a M model, mod it as required, find the guy so that you can spank him and earn your dignity back.
I'm sure your wife will understand.
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2003 BMW 330i
2016 BMW M4 - ED May 2016, PCD Aug 2016
2017 X5 xDrive35i - PCD Jan2017
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